I need to get something off my chest. A whole week has passed and my anger level has not diminished. If anything, it has risen. Todd Gurley does not deserve to be honored and praised for the atrocity he committed last week. He deserves to be shamed and punished. If it were up to me, he would be suspended this week. It’s plain and simple: Todd Gurley quit on his team and the great sports fans of Los Angeles. All 27 of those motherfuckers sat in traffic on the 405 for six and a half hours to watch Todd Gurley score touchdowns. Then, Todd takes a big dump on the field and throws it right in the fans’ faces with this quote.
Yeah, you got the win. But at what cost Todd? What cost? My son didn’t stop crying for hours after the game. All he could say was,
“Dad, why can’t I eat dinner tonight?”
“Because I had the Rams -7.5 and the over, son. I’m sorry on behalf of Todd Gurley.”
I hope you’re happy with the choices you made, Todd. There are hungry kids, Todd. What are you going to do to help, Todd?
You might be saying to yourself, “Blakey Locks, how are you going to feed your son this Sunday?” Fair question. And I have the answer. I’m a man of honor and integrity. Being a man of honor and integrity, I believe in karma. And being a man of honor and integrity who believes in karma, I believe that karma will strike Todd Gurley today against the Rams. Many are calling it the biggest game of the NFL season so far and an NFC Championship Game preview. Well, I have a strange feeling about how this one is gonna end. The Saints are going to be up more than a field goal late in the game and the Rams are going to be driving, needing a big score. The ball is going to be in Todd Gurley’s hands with a lane to the end zone. But then, his new instincts of quitting are going to kick in. It’s in most running backs’ DNA to keep their legs driving, but not Todd’s. It’s now in his DNA to stop and give up. If you don’t think that will come back to haunt him then you don’t know football.
Please join me in doing the right thing and bet the Saints this week. Anybody who respects gambling or even the game of football, can’t support Todd Gurley.
Todd Gurley is a Quitter Who Hates the People of Los Angeles and Football Fans Everywhere and My Son Needs to Eat Dinner Tonight Lock of the Millenium: Saints +1.5