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Meet Delaney From Mizzou

You know who is clearly ready for the biggest bar night of the year? Delaney from Mizzou. Do I know for sure? No, but what college student doesn’t like going back to the local bar near his/her parents home to brag about what they’ve been up to for the last three months or so? I remember those days so well.

I remember the cool kids who went away to places like Chicago, Boston or New York for college. They would roll into that redneck small town Ohio bar and act like they were transported from space. The act went something like, ‘I don’t even know this place anymore.’ 

Uh, you’ve been out of high school like two years. Don’t give me that garbage act about how you’ve become so cultured in two years. Bullshitt. I know better.

And the kids who went away to big cities stuck to their own little clique. Then there was the #MACtion clique. That clique always partied its ass off, ripping shots, slapping an ass or two. That Thanksgiving Eve group was a blast. Telling old stories, slamming beers, ripping a couple more shots, appreciating the only dive bar in town. Of course the cops would walk through at some point in the night and you’d have to figure out where they would be hiding when you stumbled out.

Delaney and her Gen Z Thanksgiving Eve crew have it made now that they can order up Uber, get their friends to give them beer money on Venmo and can document it all on social where they can gain a bunch of new followers, turn it into a social influencer account, make a bunch of money, jet off to Greece for more content opportunities and live like this until like 30. What a time to be alive.

Go enjoy Thanksgiving Eve. Don’t act like you’re better than your hometown.

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